3 New Advanced Communication Skills to Talk like a Spy

Do you ever Get stuck in a Difficult Situation?, Imagine that the pet dog of your neighbor scratch your window every night, How can you tell him?, That’s a bad example but Sometimes these types of situation appear where If you can’t do anything then it’s a Problem, and if you do something by a wrong way then it’s a big problem.

Let’s understand with a Story, Bill called Warren at night and said that He needs a Help to complete his project, Warren was working on a project before but as Bill was his friend he agreed to Help him”.

Next Morning, Bill called Rahul and said “You make everything worst, you doesn’t added The Price Chart Report”, what can you do at that time. Warren become very angry and think that He Left his project and helped Bill for late nights just because of friendship, and now bill is scolding him.

Most of us Became angry at that moment and starts quarrel, Well, Then Bill said “Are you going to complete it now, or say me no”, Warren agreed at that point. Warren Feels very Angry because he helped him and get such type of reward and Bill was also Angry and thinks that he taken help from a wrong person.

Both are Angry and situation becomes Worst, What you have to do in such types of situation?

Well, we can Solve these types of Solution in very easily and smoothly manner. For this you have to Understand 3 Important things of the conversation:

What Happened Conversation
Feeling Conversation
The Identity Conversation

3 New Advanced Communication Skills to Talk like a Spy

What happened Conversation

In this Situation, Two people are arguing with each other and Wanted to prove I’m Right, In this scenario both of them wanted to Prove themselves right but This will never provide the Actual solution, Only makes the situation worst.

Nobody wanted to be proved wrong and once if you won in the Argument then you lose it because another person will not like you, and if you lose it then you won.

Our main goal must be that the problem should not expand, for this you both have to see the issue from the Eye of a third Person.

“Don’t break the thread of Love/Relation, It will never get repaired and once if it repaired, there is always a joint in it”

- Rahim (Poet)

Let’s take a situation, your assistant put wrong project in your bag. Now you are scolding your assistant because you think that he is culprit.
You – You put wrong files on my bag, my all presentation becomes worst, and I was looking like a donkey in front of everyone.
Assistant – I’m Sorry, I will never repeat that mistake
You – How can you do that mistake
Assistant – I’m Really Sorry
You – I know you didn’t do it knowing and you have guilt for that but Do not repeat it again, Are you understanding what I am talking to you?
Assistant – I promise that I’ll never repeat that mistake.

Now, in this conversation, you are playing a Blame game, May be your mistake is also involved, you also have to Check the Files! It will never give good result.

The best conversation is that in which we try to understand the mistake not to prove others wrong. Let’s see how that conversation looks like:

· You - Today I got wrong files in my bag

· Assistant - I’m really sorry, I am feeling bad for this.

· You – I’m also feeling Bad for this, we’ve to think about past that where exactly we done the mistake, I think it is the Mistake of both of us. What is my fault in your point of view?

· Assistant – I’m not sure but we’re working for three projects at the same time, and when I asked you that which file you want then you become angry, I know that it’s my job and I have to know which files I have to present but because we’re working on three projects at the same time, Everything become unorganized.

· You – If you’re not sure, then you always have to ask to me, But I think it’s me who always become angry so that you cannot get to ask me.

· Assistant – Well, when you’re busy then you don’t want that any will disturb you therefore I tried to make a distance with you. I thanked that I will double check files but then you sent me for Photostat and till I came back, you gone your home. I know that you always crosscheck your files so that I had not called you

· You – Okay, from now, we both will double check the files, but if you’re unsure then please ask me for that, no matter how my mood will.

· Assistant – You mean when you’re angry?

· You – Yes, I will try that I will not become angry, but anyway you shall ask me.

· Assistant – If you’re saying me like that then I’m Comfortable to remind you.

· You – Yes, whenever I forget something then remind me that I tell you to ask anything

· Assistant (Laughing) - Okay I will ask you.

This conversation is differ from previous one and that’s better because in this both of them trying to find the Solution instead of playing blame game.

Feeling Conversation

One night a woman was sleeping heard a Sound, she ran to the room of her 7 Year old child and saw that he is holding a bat and the glass is broken. When she ask him that what happened, then son replied “Nothing Else”

“Nothing Else”, we also try to use this thing to show that everything is OK, Many people thinks that Facts are more important than feeling in a conversation, but that’s wrong.

Feeling is the root of conversation, Feelings matters a lot.

A Conversation without feelings changes the appearance of speaker, changes tone and body language. Hiding feelings can cause many problems and can even destroy relationships.

To share your feelings you have to Know Two things

· We’ve to know that what’re our feelings

· We’ve to share our feelings in a balanced way: Share your emotions not feelings.

If we share our feelings in a balanced way then it doesn’t cause any problem but helps both of them to understand more.

Identity Conversation

“I made a final decision to leave the job but I’m afraid to tell it to my Boss”

These type of Situation happens due to our Self-Identity, We always have to do things that are consistent with our Self Identity.

For example if you have to make your identity as an honest person then you’ll take every actions like an honest person.

When these type of situation happens, we’ve to think about that what the problem is and why it is not matching with their Self-identity?

In the Above example when the person asked that why you’re thinking like that then he replied “My dad is an honest person and I also wanted to become like him, my boss is my mentor and I don’t want to make him sad”

At that time He have to understand that he made many sacrifices throughout his life to make everyone happy, He Left many jobs and worked at weekends. If he is leaving his company for better salary then there is nothing wrong.

He have to give good education to his children and at this salary he can’t do that and lifting the job for better salary is not making him Disloyal

Conclusion

In this Article we learnt that if we have to talk to someone, Want to impress someone or even have to order someone then we have to break the conversation in three parts and present it nicely.

What happened conversation

Don’t play Blame Game, Concentrate on the solution

Feeling Conversation

Definitely share your feeling in a controlled manner

Identity Conversation

We’ve to know about our Self-Image means what we think about ourselves so that we can take some steps that doesn’t make us afraid.

Header Ads Widget

Ticker

3 New Advanced Communication Skills to Talk like a Spy

3 New Advanced Communication Skills to Talk like a Spy

What happened Conversation

Feeling Conversation

Identity Conversation